Have you heard that a surrogate can decide to keep the baby, that an egg donor is only in it for the money, or that you won’t know anything about your child’s background? Read on for the realities that disprove these myths.
MYTH: If you have a baby using donor embryos, donor eggs, and/or donor sperm, it isn’t “your” baby.
FACT: Any donor (sperm, egg, embryo) should be expected to relinquish all rights to the gametes (or the embryos), as well as to explicitly relinquish parental rights to children resulting from the donation. With sperm donation, this is typically done through consent at the cryobank. With egg and embryo donation, it is recommended that relinquishment of donor rights be documented in a direct contract between the donor and the recipient.
Of equal concern, though, is whether or not the parent who lacks a genetic connection with the child will feel a parental connection, and this should be explored with a mental health professional before people pursue assisted reproductive technology. One parent of a donor-conceived child said: “The child who came into my life is the most beautiful, spirited child…he is the child I was meant to have, and he fills me with love every minute of the day.”