You’ve spent endless energy and dollars in your longing to create a family without success. What’s next, you wonder: Do I have to give up my dream?
When you reach the point in your fertility journey when the doctor says, “I’m sorry…we’ve done all we can do apart from egg donation, embryo donation, or surrogacy,” you are already emotionally bankrupt. You’ve tried so hard. You’ve spent endless energy and dollars in your longing to create a family. But tests, time, and tears have not produced results, so now you are wondering, what’s next? Do I give up my dream?
“I realized I had a deep desire to have a child who will carry on the traits of my family. It may sound selfish, but we chose surrogacy because I wanted to have a child who might be blessed with my mom’s musical talents or my dad’s sparkly eyes.”
Taking stock of your feelings
One in eight couples struggles with infertility — and the intense emotions that come with it. Talk with your partner, talk to a counselor, or find a support group or an agency, and process this difficult time in a healthy, open way. Acknowledge everything you are feeling, and know that you are not alone. In a survey conducted by Building Your Family, here’s how some parents who’ve experienced egg donation, embryo donation, sperm donation, or gestational surrogacy described their mindsets as they began the (assisted reproduction technologies) ART process…